måndag 17 november 2008

Prinsessan Lilian bloggar 14

You all know what happened three months ago. I took a fall in my home, Villa Solbacka, was rushed to the hospital and the doctors had a go at my hip.
Prior to being put to sleep I had written down what I wanted to enjoy after surgery; just a humble list of things I thought I deserved:

Case of good old British lager
One bottle of Champagne + ice-bucket
Oysters. Loads of them
Lost DVD-box (First season). I never cared for the subsequent seasons. Things got a bit out of hands, didn't they?
Packet of fags

When I fell asleep my hip was dislocated but when I woke up again I felt disorientated. (Sounds like the lyrics to a song, doesn’t it?)
Anyway, I could hear the girls’ voices when I opened my eyes. Gretchen, Dorothy and Sheila were all laughing and clearly having a good time. It was just a plain Thursday afternoon. What were they so bloody happy about?
I raised my head a bit only to see them drinking Champagne - my Champagne.

- Oi! Hands off my Bollinger, you bastards!

They shrieked of laughter and helped themselves to a new round.

- All right then, I tried. Give us a drink for Christ sake!

- Sorry luv, you can’t have any. Doctors’ order.

Somehow their face expressions didn’t tell the story of three friends who felt sorry for me. They just kept on drinking and talking dirty to the male nurse who was supposed to look after me, not flirting with those old bags.

Gretchen lit a cigarette.

- Stop that, will you! This is a hospital. You can’t smoke in here.

- No worries, Lil. This is a private hospital and you’ve got a private room.

- Sweet, give us a fag then!

- Sorry luv, you can’t have any. Doctors’ order.

I told them to sod off but they couldn’t care less.

- Oh crap, I said and went back to sleep.

Two miserable weeks I had to spend there before being sent home. I was good to be back at my own place. I guess you wonder what I’ve been up to. I’ve just relaxed. I’ve leaned back and let my staff take care of everything, just like I’ve always done. I’m a princess, you know.

I’ve done some reading, I’ve had some Champagne, I’ve done some thinking and I’ve watched some TV.
Have you got Animal Planet at your places? It’s a bloody marvellous channel! The have programs whith animals humping. No seriously, I'm telling the truth!
And I’ll tell you another thing: They’ve got kangaroos in Australia! I’m not pulling your leg, they’ve got kangaroos there – the real deal! I mean, we’ve all seen them at the zoo but in Oz the roam freely.
I was amazed. You think you know it all, and then WHAM – you learn something new.
By the way, kangaroos are not reptiles; they’re marsupinals marziponials macedonians.

A couple of weeks ago Carl Philip inherited a mansion in Sörmland, a flat at Lidingö, some paintings and shares. All in all it was worth some 18 million kr. Article here.
This generous man met Carl Philip in the 90s when they both worked on a boat. Like many other… gentlemen, he grew really fond of the Prince and ended up making a few adjustments in his will.
You know, he could have given everything to the Red Cross that could’ve helped starving people in Africa, but he gave it all the Carl Philip! What a brilliant guy!

You see, we’re royal and we should have everything that’s coming our way.

And remember, I’m a princess and what I say goes. All right?



4 kommentarer:

Mrs Li sa...

Ha ha ha ha!!! HA HA HA!!!

Ullah sa...

Finally back in business!

Pysseliten sa...

Take care, luv!

Lady Stalker sa...

Haha, du är rolig du. ;-)